Cock-Fight

KA, SAE early favorites in 2017 Cock Fighting Tournament, DU hopes to rise and surprise

THE TUNNELS – The University of Virginia’s annual Cock Fighting Tournament sponsored by Zip Chicken will commence in March in concurrence with the NCAA March Madness basketball tournament. The fraternities have gathered new pledges now that rush has ended, and with new pledges comes new cocks to brawl it out in the tunnels that run beneath Grounds.

Kappa Alpha Order and Sigma Alpha Epsilon are the two favorites coming into the tournament, as KA has been known for generations to breed aggressively fighting cocks, and SAE has a dominant reputation after their three-year championship streak from 2011 to 2013.

Attempts to interview brothers from KA and SAE were futile, as they expressed concerns regarding anonymity, but Chi Phi released an official statement to the media last Sunday night reading:

“We brothers from the Alpha Chapter of Chi Phi promise our fans and peers a championship to bring credibility back to ‘the quad’.”

Meanwhile, The Declaration was able to get hold of a DU brother, who stated, “This is our first time competing in the tournament, so we plan to use this experience to rise in popularity on GreekRank and show that we’re just as fratty as anyone else on Grounds.” Subsequent reports indicate that the interviewee was dropped from DU pledging for “being a blabby-mouth bitch.”

Looking across the bracket, PIKA hopes to rebound after their steroid scandal in 2016 and Zete may emerge as an underdog favorite if they can surpass third seeded DKE in the first round.

Continual updates of the tournament will be published in upcoming issues of The Declaration and all bets can be submitted to our undercover representative behind the dumpsters at Thompson Hall. The code phrase is “bock on my cock.”

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Derek Richardson is a third-year who makes frats pledge for him.